Reverb10 Prompt 15

Prompt: 5 minutes. Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010.

I would remember all the laughter that my family and I have shared throughout 2010, none of the pain, anger, tough times or the loss of loved ones would even enter in the picture.  It would be the good happy times, the laughter, the beauty of their faces while smiling, the color of their cheeks when laughing so hard they turn pink and their eyes and how they sparkle. 

"Laughter is the best medicine"

Reverb10 Prompt 14

Prompt: Appreciate. What's the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?

In October of 2009 I finally made the decision to quit my part-time job. It took me over a year to have the nerve to quit.  My husband had always backed me on the decision but I could never get the "balls" to do it. 

I was always afraid that there would not be enough money for our family to survive. We are a family of seven, it was the worst financial time in U.S. history and  I wanted to quit, leaving all the burden on my husband. 

So here it is 14 months later and we are doing okay, there are no bill collectors calling, the heat and electric are on, the house is clean, the children are happy and there is food on the table. 

I am most appreciative of my husband and his job, plus the confidence he had in me and our family to survive when I did not. 

I am now a stay at home mom, taking care of our children and the household, I wish I could say that every minute of everyday I show gratitude for being at home, but I don't....sometimes everything gets to me and I am not as grateful as I should be (or its PMS kicking in!!!), I have told my husband how grateful I am and I hope he knows by the way I keep the house, or when I  shovel the snow from driveway three times in one day!!

All kidding aside...Life, Marriage and children are a give and take, and I am so thankful for my husbands giving heart, his faith, his support and his job. 

Reverb10 Prompt 13

Prompt: Action. When it comes to aspirations, its not about ideas. It's about making ideas happen. What's your next step?

aspiration as·pi·ra·tion

 [as-puh-rey-shuh n] –noun

1. strong desire, longing, or aim; ambition:

 intellectualaspirations.

2. a goal or objective desired

When thinking about this I find myself lost in thought..... realizing that I have a long lists of aspirations.....but the problem I encounter is completing or even getting the gumption to start working toward making them happen.   Why is it so hard for me to follow through???Take for example losing weight.....I need to lose 35 lbs...which doesn't seem to be a lot when I write it on paper but in my reality it might as well be 100 pounds!!

I want it bad enough ...but maybe not that bad, because when I start taking the steps of running, riding the bike, lifting weights,eating healthy....it doesn't last long, I get derailed by a cold or kids getting sick, not having time to cook dinner and eating out seem to be an easier option, house hold errands or the busyness of "shuttle service" for my children. 


 Another aspiration is to write a blog everyday...the ups and downs as a wife, mother with 5 children and the everyday happenings that I go through...sometimes serious and but most  times comical, things that story books are made of...some instances a reader might think are made up...but they are not...I have lived them!! Why don't I allow myself to do that...does the fear seem bigger than the aspiration???

 Why is it so hard to follow through???

...fear??

....not having a friends to cheer me on or go with me on runs??

....feeling alone on this journey???

...if my friends and family saw the blog, they would not give good feedback, maybe even saying it was stupid???

why does action seem like a brick wall......which is too high to get over, and it just  easier to back down???

  

  

Reverb 12 Prompt

Prompt: Body integration. This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn't mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?

To be honest...the "integration" comes and goes it is not an every moment occurrence. As I contemplate this prompt, I find myself wishing it was every moment, and wonder how I can make it as such.   

When I am running on the treadmill or outside, I feel alive and present, but the problem to get that feeling of wholeness everyday is hard with busy schedules of 5 children and a husband.  

My brain has been alert to finding wholeness, oneness with oneself, peace, harmony etc...all year long in 2010 but I have yet to have been successful. I have glimpses, milliseconds of feelings and then poof its gone.  I felt this fleeting moment in May of this year at my youngest daughters first communion....as I looked down the pew, seeing all of my children (ages 20 to 9), my mother, and my husband this overwhelming feeling welled up inside me and I just felt the peace-fullness of love's greatest power. At that moment I knew that it was possible to be alive and present to life's love and wholeness.  

Thanks Reverb for reminding me that I can be whole and enjoying the fullness and beauty of life in every moment I just have to remember to do so.

Reverb10 Prompt 11

                                              

Reverb10 

Prompt: 11 Things. What are 11 things your life doesn't need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? 

1. stress

2. anger

3. excess body weight

4. excess stuff around the house

5. cable

6. home phone

7.credit cards

8. eating out too much 

9.

10.

11.

If one really thinks about it...which most of us don't...we only have a mere +/-80 years on this earth, which isn't long at all, its only 80 Christmases, 80 birthdays, etc.... so on my lists of 11 things to eliminate stress is the number one thing that robs myself of time, time that could be spent with love ones enjoying life, instead of in a corner fretting about life and situations that I cannot control. #2 anger is also a big "life sucker", robbing me of time and energy, that ultimately leaves me depleted and alone.  #3 Weight...well what can I say 11 pounds could be the whole reverb list!!! #4 It is time to downsize.... we all accumulate a lot of crap over the years...so I think that "less is more" is the phase for the New Year!  #5 and #6 getting rid of cable and home phone will lower the bills a bit and make it possible to sit in the living room with out being hypnotized but the "boob tube", maybe the family and I could actually have enlightening conversations! #7  Credit cards can come in handy..but for the most part they enable me to buy whatever I want when I want...instant gratification....which is overrated!!! its time to rein in the cards and keep it simple, which could fall over into the rest of my life and allow me to concentrate on family memories instead of buying happiness.  #8 Cooking at home has to be a priority in 2011, It is convenient to eat out in this fast paced life...but the crap that goes into to the fast food  is bad for the body...teaching the kids to eat healthy will give them a good start to living a healthy life.   


Well for 9,10, and 11 I am not sure at this point...but hopefully making the changes 1-8 will spill over in abundance in my life and the life of my family and allow me to see a 9,10, and 11 that could be eliminated as well.

                                                                  

shhh.......it's quiet

i 

love the 

morning 

quiet.

i love watching the

sunlight 

sneak 

through

the

tree branches.

i love sitting

in 

my favorite chair, 

sipping on coffee......

...coffee 

that my

wonderful

husband brews 

for me 

every morning.

i love 

the silence 

before the kids

find their way down

the 

stairs

into my warm arms.

                    

i love 

their eyes,face and hair

that introduces them to

me in

a different way

every day, 

that 

not quite awake

look. 

i hope you 

get to enjoy some

quiet 

in your 

day today.

enjoy the 

weekend.

and don't forget to

Check out the Quote of the Day

Beth.

heavy heart.....

                                                                          

...my good friend that I had written about in previous posts, 94 year old mother died this morning. It is with a heavy heart that I write this post.

It brings thoughts to my mind of the death of my Dad and the final days I was graciously allowed to spend with him.It makes me remember how time is so precious and that relationships with our parents, good or bad, has such a strong connection to who we are and what type of person we become.  I know when I was much younger I never wanted to be like my parents, but then as the "teenage know it all" cycle wore off, and I matured, I realized that  it is inevitable that some of their characteristics get carried  over to us. I believe that everyone is a "work in progress", it takes time and  life experiences to mold our individual uniqueness.

As for my good friend, as the sun sets on the life experience that you and your mother have just traveled, it is physically over, but remember your memories are never far from your heart. May your mother be in heaven with your father, her pain gone, her body at rest, her heart at peace and filled with the love of God, and the never ending love for you and your family.  You are always in my prayers. ♥